Lord Let Me Teach!

"The Lord our God, the Lord is One...You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house..." Deuteronomy 6:4,7

Homeschooling has been a welcomed adventure for me. I have known before I had kids that God had called me to homeschool. I am not one of those everyone should home school soap box preachers. I don't think that we have the "best" curriculum and EVERYONE should use it. When people ask me why I home school, the honest answer is because God told me too. In trials that I have faced recently my assurance of making it through has been that still small voice reminding me that I have been called to teach my children.

Recently, in many venues, I have been challenged to let the gospel come to life. The challenge has stuck to me like glue. And honestly, I have been very discourage at what a poor job I do at communicating the gospel. Sure God provides the opportunity to communicate but I stumble bumble or just stay quiet. So, what does all this have to do with home schooling... good question?

Struggle would be the word that would describe the past month with Caedmon. He has confessed His sins to God and called on Christ and His Blood to save Him. So that puts everyday living in a different light for him even though he doesn't realize it.

Also with the conviction of not commicating the gospel well God has reavealed to me that the way I speak to my children is not appropriate. If I wonder why I get so much attitude and grumbling I only need to look at my words to them. Need less to say the Holy Spirit has been working over time in my heart the past week. Praise The Lord!!

So, this morning during school, Caedmon and I were flying through the activities and assignments, it was going to be a record day! Then we came to the final assignment. Writing numbers. Now, normally, I would ask him to complete the assignment and then busy my self with prep for the next day. But today was different. I wanted to see just how he was doing his work. And what I found was interesting. Halfway... tracing... halfway... writing... so I asked him to erase and write it again... then something amazing happened. He got offended. "This is the best I can do! I can't make it any better!" Now, honestly, left to my flesh I would have steamed off and called it a day sending him to his room. However, my spirit was longing to see the gospel come alive. So, I prayed to myself, asking the Holy Spirit to fill me with patience and wisdom. Taking in a deep breath, Caedmon wrote and rewrote number 80-89 at least two times each! He was so angry at me.

My heart was breaking as I saw the sin that was in his heart toward me and God. So, we stopped for a moment. I reminded Caedmon that school is an act of worship, because we are learning for the glory of God. We don't know the plans that God has for him and so we need to be diligent to learn everything to His glory. I pointed out his sin of anger and frustration. I told him that he could do better and I was not going to limit the power of God to help him. Then I gave him the choice, he could repent and continue to finish writing his numbers, or he could go to his room and in his bed cool off and repent. In deep anger and frustration he almost screamed... "I WANT TO ASK JESUS TO FORGIVE ME!" So, we put the pencil down, he came and sat in my lap and he prayed. "Jesus thank you that you will get rid of my anger toward my mommy and give me a new heart. Holy Spirit help me to do my numbers with a happy heart. In Jesus Name Amen." The Holy Spirit was in my bedroom this morning as Caedmon and I were worshiping Elohim writing the numbers 80-100!

The gospel came alive...

The moments that should...

Ryan has in the recent pasted called me "The Angry Woman"... for good reason. It takes so little to set me off that it is beginning to amaze me. In those moments that should propel me into a person that is more like Christ, I cower in the corner and do my normal thing. Instead of trusting and leaning I scream and throw. The race is hard... God is sovereign... my race in comparison to the thousands who are truly suffering around the world is laughable at best. So, in the moments that should take me to the redemptive power of Your blood, may my heart be willing to follow you there and respond appropriately.